Notice by HR to Employees during recession


Dear STAFF ,
Please be advised that these are NEW rules and regulations implemented to raise the efficiency of our firm.

1) ANNUAL LEAVE :

Each employee will receive 52 Annual Leave days a year ( Wow! said 1 employee).
- They are called SUNDAYs.

Lunch Break
a) Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch as they need to eat more so that they can look healthy.

b) Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure.

c) Fat people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drink a Slim Fast and take a diet pill. )

SICK DAYS :
We will no longer accept a doctor Medical Cert as proof of sickness.
- If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.

4) TOILET USE:
Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilets.
a) There is now a strict 3-minute time limit in the cubicles.

b) At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the door will open and a picture will be taken.

c) After your second offence, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under the "Chronic Offenders" category.

d) Subsequent pictures will be sold at public auctions to raise money to pay your salary.

5) SURGERY :
As long as you are an employee here, you need all your organs.

- You should not consider removing anything. We hired you intact.
- To have something removed constitutes a breach of employment

6) INTERNET USAGE :
All personal Internet usage will be recorded and charges will be deducted from your bonus (if any) and if we decide not to give you any, charges will be deducted from your salary.

- Important Note: Charges applicable as Rs.20 per minute as we have 4MB connection.

Just for information, 73% of staff will not be entitled to any salary for next 3 months as their Internet charges have exceeded their 3 months salary.

Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide a positive employment experience.

Lyrics of vaana (movie)

Aakasha Ganga......

aakasha ganga ninnu aapalene inkaa
aakasha ganga
mugisina kadaga migilina pratika
kadalave twaraga kadaliki jathaga
e manchu kondani vidichi vellaliga
aakasha ganga ninnu aapalene inkaa
aakasha ganga




Unatta Lenatta....

unatta lenatta vudunte ninatta cherale thidi tunaka
vinatta lenatta vintunte namaata woo kottave chilaka
nidara chedinayada kuduta padadukada
edo chestuntave nuvvu ammayi annyayanga unatta||

telusukoni aakaasavani cheliya payanaanni
aduguponi achinnadanni nannu kalavamani
emantha pani vundani paari poyindi soudamini a sangathi cheppaka unatta||

meruputeega emelika naalo migilipoyinde
chilipi saiga na manasu neetho valasapoyinde
nuvvu taakinattundaga o thadi gonthu vadilaavuga marachiponivvaka unatta||






Yeduta Nilichindi choodu.............

yeduta nilichindi choodu jalathaaru vennelemo
yadanu thadipindi nedu churukanti chinnademo
mymarachipoya maayalo...
pranamantha veechuthunte vaana veenalaa eduta||

nijamlaanti ee swapnam elapatti aapali
kale aythe aa nijam ela thattukovali
avuno kaado adagakundi na mounam
chelivo silavo theliyakundi nee rupam
chelimi bandam allukunde janma kaidilagaa eduta||

ninne cherukoleka yetellindo nalekha
vinevaaru lekha vetukundi nakeka
needo kaado nakunna chirunama
undo ledo aa chota na prema
varamlati sapamedo sonthamaindilaa




Aakasha Ganga........

aakasha ganga dookave penkitananga aakasha ganga
jala jala jadiga tholi alajadigaa
thadabadu aduga nilabadu sariga
nathalapu mudivestunda ninnapaga aakasha ganga||

kanubomma villethi o navvu visirave
chilakamma gonthetti teeyanga kasirave 2||
chitapata laade velasina vaana
merupula gaali kanumarugaina
na gundelayaloninna nealikidi aakasha ganga||

e poota vinakunna na paata aagena
a baata lonaina ne paita nodilena 2||
manasuni neetho pampistunna
ne pratimanuku thelupave anna
a jaadalanni vethiki ninnu cheraga






Sirimalle vaana........

sirimalle vaana paduthondi lona kanipinchade kantiki
vadagalla vaana vurimindi veena vinipinchade jantaki
thadise tharunaana godugai ne lena sirimalle sirimalle||

vala anukona valapanukona kalisina e bandam
valadanukunna varamanukunna tamariki ne sontham
chinukai vachave varadai munchave sirimalle||

chilipiga aadi chelimiki oodi gelicha neepaina
taguvuki cheri thalapuga maari nilicha neelona
manase neevinka kunuke koosinda sirimalle sirimalle||

Neevalle Neevalle (june pothe)

June pothe july gali……..kamanga vollo valle
puvvullo tenundama…….premallo badhundamma
innallu tochalede…….emayindo telyaledoo
navuna lovu ledu…..love una navu radeee

nina emito talavodanta….nextu emito manakelanta
nedu matrame ento mukhyam friendu
dostu mundara unade needantara….punya bhoomi lo todunta ra ra ra

premaaaaa

nina emito talavodanta….nextu emito manakelanta
nedu matrame ento mukhyam friendu
dostu mundara unade needantara….punya bhoomi lo todunta ra ra ra

June pothe july gali……..kamanga vollo valle
puvvullo tenundama…….premallo badhundamma

alarinche parimalama….vinaleva kalavarama
kinda bhoomi undi…..aate adamandi
ninge neku haddhu…..sandehallu vadu
ide tarunam……talupuki selaviche
anu nimisham…..manasuni muripinche
eee puvallonu…..kaneelane chudaledeeee

June pothe july gali………kamanga vollo valle
puvvullo tenundama…….premallo badhundamma
innallu tochalede…….emayindo telyaledoo
navuna lovu ledu…..love una navu radeee

sagipoomaa.. pasi manasa
tulipoomaa.. pulla vadillo
shilpi jevatatvam……sila chekatame
maghu valla teeru……tapulinchatame
gopa valalo una prema tongi chudam
valapanade vachi vachi poye daham
eee lokam lona unodu evadu ramudu kadooo

June pothe july gali……..kamanga vollo valle
puvvullo tenundama…….premallo badhundamma
innallu tochalede…….emayindo telyaledoo
navuna lovu ledu…..love una navu radeee

nina emito talavodanta….nextu emito manakelanta ….nedu matrame ento mukhyam friendu
dostu mundara unade needantara….punya bhoomi lo todunta ra ra ra

premaaaaa

nina emito talavodanta….nextu emito manakelanta ….nedu matrame ento mukhyam friendu
dostu mundara unade needantara…..punya bhoomi lo todunta ra ra ra

a SmaL AnD niCe sTorY

One old man was sitting with his 25 years old son in the train.
Train is about to leave the station.
All passengers are settling down their seat.
As train started young man was filled with lot of joy and curiosity.He was sitting on the window side.
He went out one hand and feeling the passing air.
He shouted, "Papa see all trees are going behind".
Old man smiled and admired son feelings.
Beside the young man one couple was sitting and listing all the conversion between father and son.
They were little awkward with the attitude of 25years old man behaving like a small child.
Suddenly young man again shouted, "Papa see the pond and animals. Clouds are moving with train".
Couple was watching the young man in embarrassingly.
Now its start raining and some of water drops touches the young man's hand.
He filled with joy and he closed the eyes.He shouted again," Papa it's raining, water is touching me, see papa".
Couple couldn't help themselves and ask the old man.
"Why don't you visit the Doctor and get treatment for your son.
"Old man said,"
Yes, We are coming from the hospital as Today only my son got his eye sight for first time in his life".


Moral: "Don't draw conclusions until you know all the facts".